Gravity
by Saruvi
Summary: Roxas is a boy who refuses to speak. Axel is a boy who is so badly scarred he won't get close to anyone. Paired up for a class project, Roxas falls in love with Axel. Can Roxas teach Axel how to love and get past the scars?
1. Speechless

**Disclaimer: **The characters Roxas and Axel and other Kingdom Hearts chars belong to Disney and Square Enix.

--

Cloud Strife couldn't believe what was happening. He was currently standing in front of a petite blonde girl who was his exact age of eighteen. She was pacing back and forth. Tears in her green eyes.

"I don't really know what to do," the girl said.

Cloud looked her. Taking in her small frame. Shaking shoulders and tears wetting her pale cheeks.

It had been a one night stand when Cloud took the girl to the prom as a favor to his mom. They'd gotten drunk and one thing led to another and they'd ended up in bed together. The aftermath of what had happened had only strenghtened Cloud's determination that he was gay.

"I don't know. If you want to get rid of it, it's your choice. But, I don't think you should," Cloud said, reaching out to take her into his arms.

His boyfriend Leon walked into the room.

Taking in the scene, Leon stopped dead in his tracks.

"She's pregnant isn't she?" the brunette said.

Cloud nodded, tightening his hold on the trembling girl.

Leon knew all about that having had almost the same thing happen to him, resulting in him now being the father of a little boy named Sora. Leon had come to terms with the fact that his boyfriend had had sex with a woman. Sometimes, you had to do things to figure out who you were in Leon's opinion. He wasn't angry with Cloud for sleeping with the girl. He'd since forgiven the blond.

"Shh, Larxene, it'll be alright. We'll think of something," Cloud said. "Maybe we should get married?" Cloud questioned.

Leon rolled his eyes. He wasn't about to let his boyfriend marry this girl. She would make Cloud's life miserable. Not because she was anything but nice, but because Cloud was anything but straight.

Larxene pulled out of the blond's arms.

"No! You're gay. Do you really think you would be happy married with a kid on the way being gay? And what about Leon?" she asked.

Cloud shrugged. "What else should I do?"

Larxene took the opportunity to run from the house after grabbing her bag.

She didn't want to marry Cloud. She didn't love him. While she really wanted to keep her baby, she didn't know what to do. She was only eighteen. And pregnant. Her parents had kicked her out when they found out about her pregnancy. She had no where to go. Unless she went to see her aunt in Hollow Bastion. So that's what she did. She left without a word to anyone.

--

"Larxene?" Cloud asked, he almost dropped the glass of milk he was holding in his hand as he stared at the beautiful girl standing on his front porch he hadn't seen in five years.

"Hello Cloud," Larxene said sweetly in her little voice.

"It's been five years. What are you doing here?" Cloud asked.

"I came to bring you your son. I need you to take him for me. My parents won't take him and if they did, they would treat him badly," Larxene said, gesturing to the parked car.

She waved a small hand and the door to the car opened. A little boy about the age of five stepped out. He had blond spiky hair and big blue eyes. He looked exactly like Cloud. He was wearing blue shorts the color of his eyes and a striped t shirt.

"My son?" Cloud said, shocked that Larxene was there in the first place. After having left five years before, Leon and Cloud had tried to find her but had had no luck.

"Where have you been?" Leon asked, coming up behind Cloud.

"Roxas, come to mommy," Larxene said."Can we come in and I'll explain everything." Cloud nodded watching as the little boy ran up the stairs of the porch, tripping and skinning his knee.

--

"So why are you here now all of a sudden?" Cloud wanted to know.

Leon was sitting in the seat next to his while Larxene washed her son's knee and put on a band aid.

"Daddy!" a little brunette yelled, rushing into the room.

"Sora, I told you we don't shout while indoors. What's up champ?" Leon said grabbing hold of his son.

"Riku is being mean to me!" Sora said, pouting. Sora suddenly noticed Roxas sitting on top of the counter. A blonde woman standing next to him.

Roxas looked at the little boy, smiling shyly. Sora smiled a big toothy grin at Roxas and asked if he wanted to play, forgetting all about Riku being mean to him. Roxas looked at his mother, silently asking if he could, smiling when she nodded and put him on the floor. The two boys ran out of the kitchen.

"Now that Roxas is out of earshot, I'll tell you why I'm here. I have cancer. The doctor's don't think I have more than six months to a year to live. I don't want Roxas to go to my parents when I die. I want him to live with you, his father," Larxene explained.

Cloud inhaled. Cancer? She was going to die? He couldn't believe the beautiful girl standing in his kitchen was going to die at the age of twenty-three.

"Larxene," Cloud started.

The girl waved her hand in front of her.

"Please, I've already yelled, cried and whatever else. It doesn't change what's going to happen to me. Please say you'll take Roxas. You're all he has," Larxene begged. "My aunt died two years ago. My parents haven't spoken to me in five years. You're his father. Please say you'll take him."

"Of course we'll take him," Leon said, taking hold of Cloud's hand.

Cloud looked at him, smiling.

Larxene and Roxas stayed for dinner. Larxene had mentioned she was returning to Hollow Bastion that night and had a long drive ahead of her. She refused to stay with the couple. Adamant about the fact that she didn't want Roxas to watch her die.

She was very sad to be leaving her son but she knew Leon and Cloud would love and take care of him. Sora and Roxas played with each other in the living room while the adults talked as it became later and later.

When Larxene went to leave, Roxas got up and went to follow. She kneeled in front of the boy and whispered something to him. He nodded and looked at Cloud. Tears formed in his blue eyes as he watched his mother walk out the door. That was the last they saw of her.

"Mommy," Roxas said quietly. Standing in the living room. He'd never been without his mother.

Cloud came over to him and went to take him in his arms, but the little boy flinched away.

"It's alright. I'm your daddy. You're going to live with me and my boyfriend and Sora. Don't you like Sora?" Cloud asked gently.

"I want mommy," Roxas said, staring at the stranger that was his father.

"He'll get used to it Cloud. Just give him some time," Leon said, leaning against the door frame that led into the kitchen.

"Roxy, wanna play?" Sora asked, taking Roxas by the hands.

"I... I want my mommy," Roxas began crying. Sora pulled the little boy into his arms. Patting him on the back.

Sora was kind and gentle at the age of six and he'd seen his daddy comforting Cloud this way when the older male had been upset a few times. So, in his little child's mind, he thought this would comfort his new found friend.

But Roxas wouldn't get used to the absence of his mother anytime soon. Crying himself to sleep every night in Sora's arms. The little brunette holding his friend. Cloud would come in and take the sobbing Roxas into his own strong arms and whisper gentle soothing words to the boy, patting him on the back until Roxas' tears would exhaust him enough for him to fall asleep. He stopped crying eventually, but he also stopped talking.


	2. Give Me A Sign

_"italics"_ - Roxas signing

_italics_ - thoughts

--

Axel slumped in his seat. He was in english class. A class he really didn't like too much. With all the poetry they were forced to read, he found it extremely boring. He was tapping his pencil on his notebook when it bounced out of his fingers and hit the floor.

Leaning down to try to pick it up, he was reaching for it when black and white checkered sneakers appeared in his line of sight. A hand that was not his own snatched the pencil up and the other person stood up straight. Axel lifted his green gaze up. Shocked to notice a pair of wide blue eyes staring at him, a face framed by spiky blond hair. Roxas Strife. The boy Axel was in love with but stayed far away from.

Roxas held out the pencil. Axel hesitated a moment before reaching for the thin wooden stick. Roxas offered a small smile. His eyes lighting up and Axel's breath caught in his throat.

"T-thank you," Axel whispered. Roxas smiled even wider.

"Mr. Strife, please take your seat so we may begin the lesson," the teacher said.

Roxas looked at the plump figure standing by the chalkboard. He frowned. Then he looked at Axel once more, smiling again. Axel could have died and went to heaven just from having the small blond smile at him.

Walking down the aisle, Roxas took his seat next to Sora and Riku. He was on the side of Sora with Riku behind him. Riku was laughing and Sora was staring at him. Roxas shrugged. Turning around in his seat, he smiled at the redhead at the back of the room once more before turning around and opening his notebook to copy down the notes the teacher was writing on the board.

--

The next day at lunch, Axel was daydreaming by the tree he always sat by during lunch break. He had his sketchpad open and was lazily sketching the blond from his english class.

No one knew that Axel could understand everything that Roxas signed to people. That Axel had purposefully taken sign language classes just to be able to understand the blond. He didn't know why Roxas couldn't or wouldn't speak, and it didn't bother him, though, he would have liked to have heard the blond's voice. He bet it was just as beautiful as the boy himself.

He glanced over to see Roxas sitting next to Riku and Sora at one of the small tables eating their lunches. He sighed and went back to sketching the boy.

Riku said something and Sora choked on his sandwich which caused Roxas to sign hurriedly asking if Sora was alright. Sora nodded and Riku apologized. Sora leaned over and kissed the silveret on the lips. Roxas rolled his eyes.

Getting up, Axel watched as Roxas walked to the trash can to dump his leftover lunch into the bin. Sliding the tray onto the top of the bin with the other empty trays.

Looking down at the drawing, he suddenly looked up when those same black and white checkered sneakers appeared in his line of sight once more. His green eyes widened when he realized Roxas could see his drawing.

"Um," Axel began, attempting to close the book, but Roxas leaned down and grabbed the book from his hands. Axel looked away.

Roxas flipped through the book. There were all kinds of drawings in the book, but most of them were of the blond. Roxas smiled faintly. He tapped Axel on the shoulder, handing the book back when the redhead looked up at him.

"_You're very good_," Roxas moved his hands fast. He shook his head when Axel frowned, waving to Sora for his friend to come translate for him.

"I can read it. You don't need Sora to come to tell me what you're saying," Axel told him.

Axel watched as Sora began to stand up. Roxas looked surprised then raised his hands again, Sora sat back down, shrugging.

"_Okay, I'm glad. It makes it easier to talk to you then if you can understand what I'm trying to say,_" Roxas signed.

Axel opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by the bell ringing for their next class. Riku yelled for Roxas to come on and Sora huffed at him.

"_I'll see you later!_" Roxas signed. Axel nodded, forgetting how to speak.

--

Instead of listening to the teacher, Roxas was doodling on his notebook during math. Axel and Riku didn't share this class with Roxas and Sora. So it was just the two of them. So far, he had draw a little figure with spiky hair. He laughed to himself when he realized it was Axel he had drawn.

"Earth to Roxas!" Sora whined, snapping his fingers in front of the blond's face.

"_What?_" Roxas asked, his fingers moving fast.

"You're daydreaming! What about?" Sora asked.

"_Nothing. Just pay attention to class_," Roxas' hands moved to sign.

Oh yeah, he was in serious trouble. He really liked that redhead. Had liked him for awhile, just didn't know how to let the guy know. Especially since he couldn't speak. It did help that Axel knew how to sign, so that would be beneficial in talking to the redhead.

--

Axel was bored. English again. The only highlight of the class was that he shared it with Roxas. Axel was tuning out the teacher by staring out the window.

"So, as I was saying," The teacher went on, "This year, you can only partner up with one other person. Not two like last year. Here is the list of who you will all be partnered up with. Riku is with Sora, Melanie is with Ann, Henry is with..." The teacher's voice droned on and on as she wrote their names on the blackboard along with the person they were partnered up with. Roxas blocked her out until he heard his name.

"Roxas is with Axel. That's all. Make sure you have a summary of what your projects will be by the end of the week for me. You have all semester to work on this," the teacher told the class.

Roxas looked back to see Axel staring out the window. The redhead must have felt him staring at him because he turned and looked at him. Roxas smiled and pointed to the blackboard. Axel noticed his name next to Roxas'. He shrugged his shoulders and then turned his head to look out the window again.

Roxas frowned, turning in his seat again as the bell rung and Sora and Riku dragged him out of the room before he got the chance to approach Axel.


	3. Reasons Why

**A/N:** Well, I don't know if skin graph's hurt, but I would imagine they itch and can be painful considering the sensitivity of some skin burns. Like what Axel has, his skin is sensitive to touch.

_"italics"_ - Roxas signing

_italics_ - thoughts

--

"Are you sure Roxas?" Cloud asked his son, handing the younger blond a plate full of food.

"_Yes dad,"_ Roxas signed, then took the plate from his father.

"Why all of a sudden? You hated it when you were younger," Sora pointed out.

"_I want to talk to Axel,"_ Roxas said, hands moving really fast as a blush spread along his cheeks.

"Who is Axel?" Leon asked, looking at Roxas, then at Sora.

"The guy that Roxas likes in english class. It's amazing. The guy has flaming red hair and really bright green eyes. And he has these tattoos under his eyes that are upside down triangles. And he can understand Roxas," Sora gushed out.

Cloud raised an eyebrow. He noticed the dreamy look on his son's face. He cleared his throat, making Roxas look at him.

"You like a boy?" the older blond asked.

Roxas nodded. _"That's not a problem is it?"_ he asked.

"Of course not hon. I just had no idea you were gay is all. So, this Axel kid can understand sign language?" Cloud asked.

"Uh huh, and it's like he likes Roxas too cause he draws him a lot in his notebook," Sora said, shoving a piece of steak into his mouth and chewing loudly.

"_Yeah, he is pretty good too,"_ Roxas signed to them, cutting up his potato.

"Well, if you're sure you want to go back to speech therapy, I'll make an appointment for you first thing in the morning," Cloud told his son.

Sora smiled and Roxas raised his hands, _"Thanks dad!"_

_--_

"Axel! Tell me what's wrong!" Kairi shouted.

"Gah, Kairi, shut up! Nothing is wrong," Axel told his little sister.

"Well, mom wants to talk to you. She's in the kitchen," Kairi told him, running down the hallway to her room.

Axel went downstairs to see what his mom wanted.

"Hi honey, I didn't know you were home yet," his mother said, coming over and placing a kiss on his cheek.

"Yeah, just got home. Kairi is annoying me already," Axel told her. She laughed.

"Just ignore her. You know she loves you. Anyway, the doctor called today. He wants to schedule you for another skin graph," his mom said.

"No. I am through with those. They hurt so much and they don't help," Axel replied, wincing.

"Well, honey, maybe enough of them will help?" his mother, Tifa said.

His father Reno came in the kitchen, tossing his jacket onto a chair.

"If he doesn't want to go, then don't make him Tifa," Reno told his wife.

Axel was grateful for his father. His mom cared but she didn't understand the pain that he had to go through to get those graphs. And the itching. And they never helped anyway. He just couldn't have normal skin.

He knew his mom just wanted him to be happy. But how could he be when he was so badly scarred he couldn't even wear t shirts? And he couldn't go swimming or shirtless around others. He kept himself covered up so no one would see the scars.

"Alright. I will call the doctor back and let him know of your decision," Tifa told him.

"Thanks mom and dad," Axel said, as he walked out of the kitchen and upstairs to his room.

Kairi was sitting on his bed.

--

"Why are you here?" Axel asked.

"What is wrong with you?" the girl asked.

"Nothing. I don't want to get any more graphs done is all," Axel told his sister.

"Well, that's not all that's wrong is it?" Kairi looked thoughtful.

"That boy I told you about, remember? The one I draw all the time," Axel started, Kairi nodded, "Well, I got paired up with him on the english class project."

"Oh wow! That's neat. Now maybe you can be with him!" Kairi squealed.

"No Kai, I can't," Axel told her.

"But why? I know you like him!" Kairi insisted.

"I don't want him to see what I look like," Axel replied.

"Axel, you don't look that bad! You make it sound worse than it is," Kairi exclaimed.

"It's bad enough. Anyway, I'm sleepy, so I'm going to take a shower and head to bed, goodnight," Axel told his sister, hoping she would leave.

He was amazed when she bounced up off the bed and pecked him on the cheek, running out of the room.

--

After his shower, he looked at himself in the full length mirror on the back of his bedroom door. It wasn't as bad as he made it seem, but like he'd told his sister, it was bad enough. That was enough to make him cover himself up with long sleeves even in the summer.

He wouldn't show Roxas what he looked like. How the burns scarred his chest and ran around his back. Covering his left shoulder up to his elbow. He didn't want the blond to know. As much as he liked Roxas, he wouldn't get close to him.

He laid down in his bed, pulling the comforter up to his chin. He thought about the blond he liked so much. It was better to stay as far away as possible. Just do the project and then be done with the boy.

He didn't want to have to explain why he was so scarred or why he wore long sleeves all the time. Or why he wouldn't get close to anyone. He just didn't want to have that conversation. So he thought it was better to shut the blond out. Even though it made his chest tighten and his heart clench painfully, it was better this way.


	4. Hot And Cold

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

Axel kicked the chair in front of him. He was in therapy. And he hated it. The therapist, Dr. Vexen was a nice man, but he creeped Axel out for some reason. Axel figured it had something to do with the soft way Vexen spoke to him and asked his questions. Like he wasn't trying to be invasive. Like he was trying to be friends.

Axel didn't need to be friends with his therapist. He only came to see the man to make his parents happy. He felt nothing he talked about with the man would make him feel better. Not like he would suddenly lose all the scars on his body and be whole again.

"Axel, you're not paying attention again," Dr. Vexen chastised softly.

"Sorry. I have a lot on my mind," Axel replied.

"Care to share? After all you're here to talk. It's what your parents are paying for," Vexen told him.

"I don't think I wish to continue the sessions any longer. I don't think they are helping," Axel answered.

"Well, perhaps group therapy would be more to your liking then? I don't feel you're ready to quit coming to see me. So I'll set you up with group counseling instead," Vexen said.

Axel glared at the man, causing Vexen to chuckle softly.

"It won't be that bad. The patients that come to group therapy are all about your age. It'll be fine. If you don't like it after a few sessions, you can come back to private appointments," Vexen explained.

Axel had no choice but to agree. His parents really wanted him to get better. The two sat in silence until Axel's time was up. He pretty much ran out of the office when the buzzer sounded. Vexen sighed and jotted down a few words on his notepad.

--

Roxas was waiting for Axel the next day at the front of the school. The blond was bouncing on the heels of his feet. All happy like. He had told Sora and Riku that he needed to see Axel to go over their summary of the project they were doing for english.

In truth, Roxas just wanted to see Axel. To talk to him again. To be close to the other boy. To tell him how he felt, well, he wouldn't go _that_ far. Short of pulling teeth, Roxas refused to confess to Axel. Especially since he didn't even know if Axel was gay. Though, he was hopeful and had a feeling the other boy was.

He didn't know how to get Axel to get out of his shell. He was trying to think of ideas to help the other boy but without knowing exactly _why_ Axel was so closed off didn't make things easy. Roxas wanted to help the redhead. He wanted to see the boy laughing and happy. His heart clenched knowing how much he liked the other boy.

Shrugging, he glanced up and noticed Axel walking slowly towards him. The redhead's green eyes widened when they spotted Roxas standing in front of the school gates.

"What are you doing here?" Axel asked.

"_Waiting for you,_" Roxas replied, his hands moving in the motions of his signing.

"Why?" Axel asked. Why would the blond be waiting for him? And why was he behaving so happily?

Axel glared at the blond. Roxas grinned sheepishly.

"_Well, we have to go over our summary. I don't have your number or I would have texted you,_" Roxas admitted, running a hand through his blond spikes.

"Oh," Axel's glare softened without him realizing it. The blond was making him care and he didn't like it. But he couldn't stop it. Roxas was just so... cute and friendly to him.

"_Who do you want to do the project on?_" Roxas suddenly signed. He handed Axel a piece of paper with a list of author's on it.

"Um, John Keats is on the list and not taken. Let's do him," Axel said, taking the list. "And here's my number for you to text me if you have anything you need to discuss so you don't have to wait so early in the morning for me next time."

Axel scribbled his number on a corner of a page in his notebook, ripped it off and handed it to Roxas.

"_Alright. Keats it is. I'll text you later. See you in class!_" Roxas signed, and then ran off.

"What a weird kid," Axel muttered to himself, a tiny smile creeping up the corners of his mouth. When he realized he was almost smiling, he frowned, shaking his head, he went to class.

--

Roxas stopped running as he neared his locker. He was happy he'd gotten the redhead's number. Now, if he could just get the boy to be friends with him maybe they could go out on a date or something. But somehow, Roxas knew that would be the hard part. Getting Axel to go out with him. He'd probably have to drag him out under the pretense of working on the project.

But Roxas figured if he had to use the project to get closer to Axel, it would be worth it. His phone suddenly buzzed with an incoming text. He took it out of his pocket and glanced at it.

**Sorry about before. I'm not used to talking to people much,** it said.

Roxas texted back. **It's cool. Do you want to hang out tomorrow after school and go over the summary?**

**Um sure. That will work. We can go to my house, **came the reply.

Roxas sent back a final text then headed to class.** That'll be cool! I'll meet you in front of the school gates after last period!**

**--**

"Ugh I hate math!" Sora whined.

"_Shush, Sora, you're going to get us into trouble,_" Roxas signed.

Sora pouted and Roxas laughed. Small breathy like. No sound coming out. Sora missed having class with Riku and Roxas wished Axel was in his math class. Sora was still pouting when the teacher announced a pop quiz. Roxas groaned and took out his notebook.

--

Roxas had group therapy after school that day. He had it every Wednesday in fact. He was the first one in the room, followed by two girls and three boys about his age. He looked down at his sneakers. He hated therapy. The other kids couldn't sign so they couldn't understand him. The doctor, Vexen, could sign so he knew what Roxas was saying but still, Roxas felt isolated in therapy.

Vexen walked in followed by someone new. Roxas looked up, his blue eyes widening as they met a pair of piercing emerald eyes.

"We have a new patient that will be joining us from now on. This is Axel Flurry. Axel, these are the kids I told you about," Vexen said.

Axel took a seat next to Roxas and turned to the blond.

"_Axel? What are you doing here?_" Roxas signed.

"I have to come to therapy to make my parents happy," Axel said.

"_Why?_" Roxas prodded.

"I don't want to talk about it," Axel said, then looked away. He closed up and Roxas felt sad that he'd apparently made the redhead unhappy.

Vexen sighed. It wouldn't be easy to get Axel to open up. But at least there was one person the boy knew in the group. Maybe that would help.


	5. Feeling Good

**A/N:** Well, thanks everyone so far for the reviews! I am happy you're all enjoying the story. I hope the longer chapters make it better to read.

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

Roxas walked home after therapy. Axel had refused to talk during the session. Roxas himself hadn't said too much either. He had kept his eyes on the redhead. Wondering why someone like Axel was there in the first place.

When he got home, he trudged upstairs to his room. Throwing his bookbag on the floor, he flopped on his bed and sighed. Sora came in a few moments later, grinning from ear to ear.

"Roxy! Guess what!" Sora exclaimed, flopping on the bed next to Roxas. Roxas scooted over to make room for the brunet. Lifting his hands up, he asked,

"_What?"_

"I had sex with Riku!" Sora giggled, blushing. Roxas sat up, staring at his friend.

"_You what?"_ Roxas asked.

Sora nodded, and repeated what he had said. "I had sex with Riku."

"_Really? How was it?"_ Roxas signed.

"It was amazing. Fantastic. Riku knew just what to do even though it was his first time too. We did it like three times in his bedroom. His parents weren't home," Sora explained.

Roxas' blue eyes widened. Then he hugged his friend.

"_I'm happy for you Sora. You have someone to love you,"_ Roxas signed.

"Hey, you'll find someone too! What happened at therapy today?" Sora asked.

"_Axel was there. I don't know why though. He wouldn't talk to anyone,"_ Roxas motioned with his hands.

Sora frowned. Why would Axel be in therapy?

"I wonder why he was there," Sora asked in a faraway kind of voice. Roxas stared at his friend. He shrugged.

"_Dunno, he wouldn't even talk to Vexen,"_ Roxas motioned.

"Boys! Dinner's ready!" Leon called up to them. They hugged each other once more and then ran out of the room.

--

Axel huffed at his sister. She was in his room again. Badgering him with questions.

"Kai, just go away!" Axel shouted, exasperated.

"What happened at therapy today? It was your first group session right?" Kairi asked, standing by the door. She smiled when her brother nodded. Sometimes, she thought it was like getting blood from a stone to get her brother to talk. He was always so closed up. It made her sad.

"Well? Tell me more," she said.

"Nothing happened. I wouldn't talk. That kid I like was there though," Axel told her. He sat on his bed, drawing up his legs and resting his head on them. Arms wrapped around his knees.

"Really? Did he say why he was there?" Kairi asked, surprised.

Axel shook his head. "No, some annoying twit of a girl kept interrupting everyone to tell how she had been raped by her step dad and she wouldn't let anyone else talk."

Kairi made an "oh" movement with her pouty lips. She lifted her head in the air just as their mother shouted that dinner was ready and for them to come downstairs to eat.

--

When Axel laid in bed that night, he couldn't stop thinking about Roxas. Why was the blond in therapy? Maybe because the boy wouldn't speak? Then if that were the case, then Roxas _could _speak and just _wouldn't_.

He thought he would just ask Roxas the next day why he wouldn't speak. Not really caring that it wasn't fair that he expected an answer from the blond when he himself wouldn't fess up to why he wouldn't talk to anyone himself.

His cell phone buzzed and he picked it up. Using the night from his night light to see who was calling he was surprised to see it was Roxas.

**We still on for tomorrow?** Came the text.

**Of course,** he sent back.

**Good. Were you sleeping?** The new message asked.

**No, I was just thinking about today, **he typed in, not caring to be guarded at the moment.

**What about today?** Roxas sent back.

**Why are you in therapy? Is it because you won't talk?** Axel typed.

It took five whole minutes for Roxas to send back a message. Axel counted the minutes so he knew how long it had taken the blond to respond.

**I have separation issues. My mom left me when I was five. She left to die. Then I stopped speaking. My dad says therapy should help,** the reply said.

**Oh. Sorry to hear about your mom,** he quickly sent back. He was prepared for the next question.

**Why were you there? **

**I don't want to talk about it. I'll just say I had an accident. I'm going to bed now. See you tomorrow, **he typed in and laid the phone down.

He didn't pick it up when the last message came through.

**Goodnight Axel.**

--

Roxas woke up groggy but in a good mood. Today was the day he would be going to Axel's house. He would be hanging out with his redhead.

Wait a minute. _His_ redhead?!

He had never really thought that Axel belonged to him but now that he realized it, he was beginning to think of ways to get Axel to date him. He really liked the boy. He wanted to be with Axel. To date him like Sora and Riku were. To love him. And he wanted Axel to love him back.

Even if the redhead was closed in on himself. Something bad must have happened to make Axel like he was. Roxas was going to find out what happened to make Axel shut himself down.

Roxas would eventually find out, he was sure of it. But he hoped it didn't destroy their budding friendship in the process. Pushing aside thoughts of love and dating, he decided first to be friends with Axel. Then slowly draw him into dating. Before Axel knew what happened, they would be together. Roxas thought it would work. He just hoped Axel didn't run screaming.

--

Axel stepped out of the shower and towel dried his red hair. He couldn't stop thinking about a certain blond. He really liked Roxas. Had always liked him but he would have to be careful not to become attached to the boy.

Attachments came with questions. And Axel didn't feel like answering. Plus, he never wanted Roxas to see his scars from the fire. He would rather die than show the boy how hideous he looked underneath his clothing.

How could he love someone and yet, not want to be near them? He thought it was a paradox. One he hated. He wanted to hold Roxas. Kiss him, be with him. Make love to him. But, in doing so, he would be giving up part of himself and opening himself up to all kinds of questions about what had happened and he was loathe to answer those questions.

So, he would do this project. Then, he would go back to being alone. He only hoped he didn't break when he had to walk away from the blond he loved.


	6. Breaking The Skin

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

There were those sneakers again. Roxas was standing next to Axel as the redhead lounged by his favorite tree during lunch. Roxas knelt next to the boy.

Axel glanced up. Roxas was smiling at him. His blue eyes sparkling and Axel felt his jeans tighten and his palms become sweaty.

Roxas leaned over and tapped Axel on the hair, pulling out a leaf that had floated down to embed itself in the red spikes. Roxas held the leaf up for Axel. The redhead taking it gently from the blond's fingers. Roxas laughed, a breathy soundless laugh that enchanted Axel.

"_Can't wait for after school,"_ Roxas signed.

"Why is that?" Axel asked.

"_I get to go over to your house and spend time with you!"_ Roxas signed, _"I'm excited."_

"Roxas! Hurry up or we'll be late for math class!" Sora yelled tossing his leftover lunch into the trash bin. Riku leaned over and kissed the brunet making Sora blush then the silveret smirked.

"_See you after school Axel!"_ Roxas hurriedly signed then ran off to follow Sora, who was waving bye to Riku.

--

"You know, he really likes you," Riku said, kicking at the dirt by the tree.

Axel looked up at the silver haired boy. Riku knelt down next to Axel.

"Don't hurt him. If you're not interested, tell him now," Riku told him, then stood up. "Just don't play games with his heart."

With that said, Riku walked off. Axel stared at the silveret, then picked up his tray and walked to the trash bin to toss the remainder of his lunch in the bin.

--

Axel stared at the leaf Roxas had given him at lunch. He put it in his sketchpad, on top of a drawing he'd done of Roxas smiling. He was too far gone to end it now. Even though he kept repeating what Riku had said to him, he wanted to end it, but something about the blond kept pulling him back in.

He couldn't just walk away. He didn't understand it. He wanted to. He _needed_ to. But he couldn't. And now he knew Roxas liked him back. That made a lot of difference in the choice to stay by the blond's side.

But it wouldn't last. When Roxas saw his scars. Saw how truly ugly he was underneath his clothing, he would run away and leave. And Axel would be left alone. Cold as ice.

Axel closed his eyes. Why did this happen anyway? He was fine with just liking the blond from far away. Why did they have to be teamed up for the stupid project in english?

Opening his sketchpad, he looked at the leaf again. It was still vibrantly green like the blue sparkling eyes of Roxas. Though, it was wilting around the edges.

He loved the boy he realized and he would try not to let go. Though, just as the leaf would eventually wither and dry out and die, so would this. He could only hope they didn't break apart when it happened.

--

Axel punched his locker. Swearing to himself when the pain that shot through his knuckles reached throughout his entire arm. He looked at his hand. His knuckles were scraped from the metal of the locker. Blood beading up through the shredded flesh.

He just couldn't walk away. Though after telling himself he would, he just found he couldn't get away from those blue eyes. That honey blond hair. Christ, he was a mess! He was already in too deep.

He was going to get hurt. And so was Roxas. And there was nothing either of them could do to stop it. Axel only hoped they could catch each other because if they didn't, both boys would break in half and that would kill Axel. Knowing he'd hurt the one person he really loved.

--

Roxas shoved his books into his backpack when the bell rung signaling the end of the school day. He was so excited to be hanging out with Axel he pushed aside any doubts he had about the two of them together. He would find a way to make Axel love him back.

Running down the hallway, he skidded to a halt when he saw Axel standing by the gates waiting for him. He smiled and tapped the boy on the shoulder.

Axel whipped around and looked at him, startled. Roxas laughed. That enchanting breathy laugh Axel loved so much. His eyes shining in the sunlight had Axel wanting to kiss him, he had to hold himself back though.

Roxas lifted his hands up, _"Waiting long?"_ he asked.

Axel shook his head, "No just got here actually. Let's go. We can walk. My house isn't too far."

Axel and Roxas walked to his house and Axel unlocked the door explaining that his parents were at work and his sister at cheer leading practice.

"Want something to eat?" Axel asked. Roxas shook his head.

--

Somehow they ended up in Axel's room. Sitting on the bed with the deep blue comforter. Papers scattered around them. Roxas leaned in and Axel met him halfway.

Their lips connected before either of them could stop themselves. Axel thought of pulling back but he found that instead of doing that, he had lifted his hands to run them through Roxas' blond hair. Roxas was moaning and Axel licked the boy's lips seeking entrance to that soft pliant mouth.

Roxas pulled away as Axel licked his mouth. He opened his mouth and dove back in. Kissing Axel with a passion that took Axel's breath away. God, this was heaven. And Axel began to cry from what he would lose if this went any further. He pulled away.

"I think... I think you need to leave," Axel panted.

"_Why? Didn't you like it?"_ Roxas asked, hands moving fast.

"That's not the point. I can't do this. I can't! I won't!" Axel shouted. "I won't let you inside! Dammit. You need to go now!"

Roxas' eyes filled with tears as he gathered up his books and headed home. His lips tingling from the kiss. He didn't understand what had happened. Why did Axel react that way? Didn't he like it too?

Roxas mentally kicked himself. Maybe he pushed too soon. Now he had to find a way to make it up to the redhead.

--

Axel threw his books to the floor. He was still crying. He wouldn't let this happen. He would keep his distance. He would do the project but he would stay far away from Roxas. And his heart would be safe. His secret would be safe and no one would have to see his scars. Roxas wouldn't have to see how truly ugly he was.


	7. Trauma

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

Roxas moped around the house that weekend. He didn't go to school on Friday and now that it was Saturday, he was too depressed to go out. Sora tried to get him to go to the beach with him and Riku but the blond refused.

He just nestled on the sofa, cuddled in a big comforter and watched television all day. He kept thinking about Axel and their kiss. He still didn't understand what had happened or what Axel had meant by saying he wouldn't let him inside.

Was Axel so hurt by whatever that he wouldn't take a chance on happiness? What could be the problem? Roxas was determined to find out. He loved Axel. He knew it was more than like and so he figured it was love. Yes, he loved the redhead. Moody as he could be, he loved him anyway.

"Roxas, you have been moping for two days. What's wrong with you?" Cloud asked, coming into the living room and sitting next to Roxas on the sofa.

Roxas shifted and turned off the television. He needed to tell someone what happened and Sora was out with Riku.

"_I love someone. And we kissed at his house but he pushed me away and told me to leave,"_ Roxas signed. His shoulder's slumped and he let out a sigh.

"It's that Axel boy?" Cloud asked. Roxas nodded. "Then why don't you find out why he pushed you away? Maybe you scared him?"

"_I don't know Dad. It was going so well. And then he was crying and yelling at me that he wouldn't let me inside and that I needed to leave,"_ Roxas signed fast.

"Ah, he's scared honey. Just go talk to him and I'm sure you two can work things out," Cloud said, patting his son on the head.

Roxas closed his eyes, then opened them again, signing to his father, _"thanks dad."_

--

Roxas took a shower, determined to go see Axel and find out what had happened on Thursday. He decided to just wear cargo shorts and a striped t shirt. Letting his hair dry naturally into spikes. Tugging on his black and white sneakers he grabbed his cell phone and left the house.

Axel lived two blocks away. Across a field and an alleyway that was a shortcut. Roxas was always told by Riku and Sora never to cut through the alleyway. But he didn't want to waste any time, so he walked slowly down the alley.

He turned around when he heard footsteps behind him. He winced as he was slammed up against a wall. His head hitting the bricks.

"Hello pretty thing!" a man slurred in his ear. Roxas whimpered as the man licked his neck. "Wanna have some fun?"

Roxas shook his head.

"Too bad. I want some fun. And you look like you'll be good," the man was fiddling with Roxas' shorts. Roxas began panicking as the man traced patterns on his skin under his t shirt.

"You're a virgin I bet. This will be so good. I'll treat you right," the man slurred as he sucked on Roxas' neck.

Roxas' eyes went wide as the man slipped his hand into his shorts, rubbing his hand over his member. Roxas was so scared he was crying. He was about to be raped. But he suddenly got mad when the man started to shove his hand into his underwear.

Raising his knee, he kicked the man between the legs. The man yelped in pain. Curling up in a ball on the floor and Roxas ran as fast as he could.

His head was bleeding and he felt dirty. He was crying. He could feel where the man had sucked on his neck. And it felt disgusting to him. He had to get home. But he knew, if he went home, his dad and Leon would ask him all kinds of questions.

Maybe he could go to Riku's house? No, Riku was at the beach with Sora. He could go there, but he didn't want other people staring at him, plus Sora would tell his dad and then there would be the questions.

He thought of where he had been headed before all this happened. Axel's house. So he continued to run in that direction.

--

Roxas was still crying when he collapsed a block away from Axel's house. He couldn't run anymore. He was still scared and panicky.

Grabbing his cell phone out of his pocket, he texted Axel.

**Axel, it's Roxas. C-can you come get m-me? **

It took less than a minute before Axel replied. Roxas looked through his tears at the message on his cell.

**Roxas where are you? Why are you texting? Aren't you mad at me? **

**Not now. Please Axel, s-something bad almost happened. I n-need you to come get me, **Roxas sent back. Shuddering in his fear.

**Alright, where are you? **The incoming message asked.

**The c-corner by your street. I'm s-sitting on the ground, **Roxas texted back and the phone fell from his fingers. He sat and cried. While he waited for Axel.

--

"Roxas!" Axel skidded to a halt when he saw the blond laying on the ground.

"_Axel,"_ Roxas signed weakly. He was still so scared and he began crying again.

"What happened to you? You're bleeding!" Axel shouted, noticing the blood coating Roxas' neck and soaking into the collar of his t shirt.

"_Something bad. Please, can we go to your house?"_ Roxas signed.

"Y-yeah, come on. Let me help you up," Axel said, helping Roxas stand.

Roxas leaned against Axel, taking in the comforting presence of the tall redhead. He was still shaking and Axel leaned up against him to support him. Axel didn't ask anymore questions. There would be time for that when they got to the redhead's house. They walked down the block and went into Axel's house.

Axel was glad no one was home but him. He didn't want to have to explain why Roxas was bleeding. Especially since he didn't know the answer to that question yet.

He brought Roxas upstairs and into his bathroom. He sat the boy down on the side of the tub and looked at his head.

"Geez Rox, what happened to you?" Axel asked, gingerly moving some of the hair aside to check the wound. It wouldn't need stitches, so that was good. He was just worried about Roxas having a concussion from the swelling that was appearing.

"_Some guy. H-he tried to r-rape me,"_ Roxas signed so fast Axel almost didn't catch it all.

"What the hell?!" Axel shouted angrily.

The thought of someone touching Roxas that way had him incensed. He wanted to hurt the bastard that did it.

Roxas closed his eyes and passed out. Slumping over on the edge of the tub. Axel picked the boy up and brought him into his room. Laying him down on his bed.


	8. So Cold

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

While Roxas was sleeping, Axel took the opportunity to wash and disinfect the wound on his head. It was still slightly bleeding, but it was slowing down to a stop. Axel was worried about the swelling that was occurring around the wound.

Roxas woke up after Axel was done cleaning the wound. He started heaving and Axel knew he was going to throw up, so he placed a wastebasket in front of the boy. Roxas retched into the basket, then laid back down. Shaking.

He was so cold. And he felt so dirty from where that man had touched him. He looked up to see Axel watching him. Green eyes narrowed in concern. Axel didn't know what else to do. He was worried about Roxas and the boy's forehead was really hot and he was shivering despite being under two blankets.

"We need to call your father. You're sick and I don't know what to do," Axel said.

Roxas raised his hands weakly and gestured to his cell phone, which Axel had placed on the nightstand next to the blond.

"_Number's in there,"_ Roxas signed slowly.

Axel nodded as he picked up the cell and went through the contacts. When he found the one listed "home" he pressed dial and let it ring. A man answered after three rings.

"Hello? Is this Cloud Strife?" Axel asked.

Roxas was throwing up again, heaving into the wastebasket. Axel ran a hand over the boy's forehead to find it hot when the blond had laid down again.

The guy on other end of the phone told him to hold on while got Cloud.

"This is Cloud," came a soft voice like Roxas'.

"This is Axel Flurry. Your son Roxas is a friend of mine. He was in an accident and is at my house. But he's really sick and I don't know what to do," Axel explained in a hurry.

"Address?" Cloud asked. Axel gave it to him. "I'll be there in ten minutes. Watch him please." Then Cloud hung up.

"Your dad is coming. It'll be alright," Axel told Roxas as he set the phone down and sat next to the shivering blond.

Roxas smiled weakly as he shut his eyes.

--

"What happened to him?" Cloud asked Axel. They were standing in front of the bed. Cloud was looking at his son who was still shaking under the blankets.

Leon had went with Cloud to pick up Roxas at Axel's house. Surprisingly, Sora and Riku were there as well.

"He said a man tried to rape him. He texted me and asked me to come get him on the corner," Axel explained.

Sora gasped and Riku wrapped his arms around the brunet.

"I'm going to take him to the hospital. His head is really hot and you said he's been throwing up. He sounds like he has a concussion. And we need to get him checked out," Cloud told him.

Axel nodded and watched as Cloud picked Roxas up. They walked downstairs, Cloud carrying his son as Leon went to get the car.

"Thank you for taking care of my son Axel. I'll have Roxas call you when he's better," Cloud told the redhead. Axel nodded. He wanted to go with them but he didn't want to intrude.

"Why don't you come with us Axel? You know, so you can see for yourself that Roxas is alright," Sora suggested.

Axel was grateful to Sora for suggesting it and he nodded slowly. All three boys followed Cloud out and hopped in Leon's car. Cloud was in the front holding Roxas to his chest as they drove to the hospital.

--

At the hospital, Roxas was admitted to the emergency room to be checked over. He had a concussion and the wound had begun bleeding again. They decided it needed a few stitches, despite Axel thinking it wouldn't need any.

"You said he told you a man tried to rape him?" Cloud asked, turning to Axel.

"Yeah," Axel replied.

"So tried, as in didn't. Leon, should we have him checked out anyway?" Cloud asked his boyfriend.

Leon nodded. They would have Roxas checked out for rape just in case he hadn't wanted to tell Axel. They were glad when the examination came up negative for rape.

Axel breathed a sigh of relief. He was still so angry that someone had dared touch Roxas like that.

--

"_Dad,"_ Roxas lifted his hands to sign when he saw his father and Leon. His eyes widened when he saw Axel standing next to Riku and Sora in the doorway to the room they put him in.

"It's alright Roxas. You're going to be fine. You just have a concussion and they want to keep you here for observation overnight. You can come home tomorrow," Cloud explained walking over to his son.

"_Axel,"_ Roxas signed again. He waved a hand and the redhead moved to enter the room, coming to stand next to the bed.

"Let's give them some time alone," Cloud said, as he dragged Leon, Riku and Sora out. Sora began pouting but Leon glared at him and he stopped.

"_Axel, thank you,"_ Roxas motioned with his hands. He lifted one up to grab at Axel's hand. The redhead allowed him to hold him by the hand, enjoying the electricity that coursed through the contact.

"I'm angry that someone did this to you Roxas. I was so worried. So scared something would happen to you. I am so sorry that I yelled at you," Axel told him, beginning to cry.

"_It's okay, really. Maybe you'll tell me why you yelled at me," _Roxas replied.

"Not now," Axel mumbled and Roxas nodded. Axel wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve.

He was sleepy, but he wanted to be with Axel. The redhead was having similar thoughts, though he was suddenly struck with the fact that Roxas was holding his hand. He pulled back. Stepping backwards.

"I have to go. I'm glad you're alright Roxas. I will see you at school," Axel muttered as he practically ran from the room.

Roxas' eyes filled with tears. Axel turned around to catch one last look at the blond, seeing the tears streaming down the boy's face.

Roxas didn't understand why Axel didn't want to be near him. That hurt more than he could have imagined. He wanted to know why. Wanted to know what made the redhead push him away.

_I will find out what is wrong with him,_ Roxas thought, before yawning and falling asleep.

--

Axel kicked the wall outside the hospital. He had almost gotten close again. This had to stop. He couldn't be close to Roxas. He just couldn't be. He didn't want to burden Roxas with his unhappiness or have the blond leave him when he saw the scars.

It had been so nice to have Roxas holding his hand. What did he do, he ended up hurting the blond. And he hated himself for it. He called his mom to come pick him up but refused to tell her anything. She dropped the subject for which he was grateful.


	9. Killing Me Softly

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages / card message

--

Axel was excited. He would finally be seeing Roxas again after three days. They had kept Roxas home so he could recover fully after being released from the hospital according to what Sora had told Axel when the redhead asked how the blond was doing.

As excited as he was though, he was going to keep his distance from the boy. He had to. He could already _feel_ Roxas creeping into his skin. And he didn't like it. Well, truth be told, he _did_ like it. He just couldn't afford to let it continue.

He walked to his locker. Blinking when he saw something taped to the front of it. It was a green leaf. Much like the one that Roxas had plucked from his hair that one day by the tree. There was a card as well.

He opened the envelope.

**Axel, **

**I don't know what I did to hurt you. I'm sorry if I did anything wrong. I really am. I want to be your friend and I want you to know your friendship means a lot to me. I really do like you. Please forgive me for upsetting you.**

**~Roxas**

Axel mentally kicked himself. Now Roxas thought it was his fault for the way Axel was behaving.

Storming down the hallway, he stopped by Roxas' math class. Looking in the small window in the door, he noticed Roxas sitting doodling on his notebook. Sighing, he opened the door and marched over to Roxas. Grabbing the boy from his seat, he tugged him from the room.

The teacher was so shocked, she didn't have time to say anything. Sora gasped, his blue eyes going wide and his jaw dropping.

--

Outside in the hallway, Axel was still tugging Roxas. Who was surprisingly not resisting. The redhead walked really fast and the blond ran to keep up with him. His hand held tightly in the redhead's grasp.

Finding a deserted bathroom, Axel ran inside and slammed the door shut.

"It's not your fault you know," Axel huffed, catching his breath.

"_What?" _Roxas signed.

"I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself," Axel told the blond.

"_Why are you so mad at yourself Axel?"_ Roxas motioned with his hands.

Axel sighed. "I'd really rather not talk about it." Roxas frowned and Axel added, "I'm not ready to tell you just yet. Sometime I will though."

"_Fair enough,"_ Roxas motioned.

"Sorry I dragged you out of class. I just had to tell you I wasn't mad at you," Axel said, standing close to Roxas. He stepped closer. And Roxas braced himself for what was coming.

"_It's okay,"_ Roxas signed. Lifting his chin, he stared at Axel.

Axel's lips came crashing down on his own and Roxas moaned. Loving the feel of the redhead's lips on his once again. Axel placed his hands on the blond's hips. Gripping tightly. Roxas wound his hands in the spiky red locks.

Licking Roxas' lips had Axel begging for entrance. Roxas parted his lips, allowing Axel's tongue to slip inside. Roxas clenched his hands, his fingers tugging on Axel's hair.

Axel moaned deep in his throat, pulling away from the panting Roxas. The blond's blue eyes were glazed over with desire. Axel had to keep himself calm even though his heart was hammering so hard in his chest he thought it might burst out.

"That... that was good," Axel panted.

Roxas nodded. He was trembling and Axel brought his hands up to the boy's shoulders in an attempt to calm the blond down.

"_What now?"_ Roxas signed.

"Well, I don't know. I don't want to be close to you. But I already am and I don't know how to stop from getting closer. I'm not sure that I want to stop anymore. I'm scared," Axel admitted.

"_Of what? I won't hurt you,"_ Roxas told him using his hands slowly so Axel wouldn't miss what he was trying to say.

"Let's just take it slow. I'm not sure how this will turn out. I like you. I do, but, I just don't know," Axel said.

Roxas nodded. The door to the restroom opened up and Sora stood there huffing.

"You're in a lot of trouble Axel. Grabbing Roxas from class like that. The teacher sent me to find you and I heard you talking so I looked in here. Roxas go back to class," Sora said.

Roxas frowned but did as he was told. Waving bye to Axel.

"_We'll talk more later,"_ he signed as he left the bathroom. Axel nodded slowly. Preparing himself for Sora's wrath.

--

"You're playing games aren't you?" Sora asked, glaring.

"I'm not," Axel replied.

"I think you are. One minute you're all over him the next you're pulling away. Yeah, he tells me everything. So I know what's been going on," Sora told the redhead.

Axel closed his eyes, then ran a hand through his hair. He could still feel Roxas' fingers tugging on his hair. He opened his eyes.

"Look. I really do like him. I just told him I wanted to take it slow. He was fine with that. If I find I can't handle it, I'll back off," Axel said.

"Fine. But if you hurt him, I will have Riku kick your ass," Sora replied. "I have to get back to class now. See you around."

--

Axel leaned against the wall in the bathroom. Sliding down, he sat on the floor. His back to the wall. What a total mess. First Riku, now he had Sora warning him against hurting Roxas. Did they not think the blond could fend for himself?

He didn't want to hurt the blond, so he said he would try to be with him. But, he already knew, well he already felt that he wouldn't be able to keep his promise. He was just too broken. Hanging his head, he stood up and left the bathroom.

He decided to skip the rest of the day and headed home to take a nap. He sure needed one. His head was killing him. Though, his lips tingled from that kiss and he smiled despite himself.

He would work hard to make this turn out well. He decided he couldn't stand to be the cause of the blond's pain. So, he would make sure he didn't hurt the boy.


	10. Somebody Save Me

**A/N:** Gosh, I hope this chapter came out right.

--

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

Axel was scared. He had been dating Roxas for three weeks and they were going to the beach for a picnic and some fun in the ocean. He was so afraid he began vomiting in the bathroom. His stomach twisting and turning. He didn't want to go.

He wouldn't be able to wear a long sleeve shirt at the beach. People would look at him funny. He also didn't want to have to explain to Roxas why he wasn't wearing a t shirt and instead long sleeves on a warm day.

His scars would be visible. He didn't want people to see them, especially Roxas.

Kneeling down, his stomach emptied its contents once again. He kept throwing up until all that was left were dry heaves. He _really_ didn't want to go.

Rushing into the bedroom, he grabbed his cell phone. Texting Roxas.

**I'm sick, I can't go,** he typed in and hit send.

The phone buzzed a moment later.

**What's wrong?** It asked.

**I've been throwing up and I don't really feel up to going out, **Axel typed back. Hitting send, he laid on his bed and waited for the reply.

**Okay. If you're sick. I will tell Riku and Sora to go without us and I will come over and keep you company instead,** the reply said.

Axel stared at the phone. Roxas would do that for him? Give up a chance to hang out with his friends to hang out with Axel?

**You don't have to. You can go to the beach if you want,** Axel quickly typed in.

Though, he found he did want to spend time with the blond who was now his boyfriend. His breathing hitched at the next message.

**I'd rather hang out with you than go to the beach. So, say I can come over because I'm heading that way anyway,** was the reply.

Axel had to smile at the blond's reply.

**Alright. See you in a few,** he typed back and put the phone down on the nightstand.

--

Roxas arrived a few minutes later. Axel rushed down the stairs to let the boy in. Roxas had a basket in his hands. Stepping into the house, he handed the basket to Axel.

"_Figured since you couldn't go on the picnic, I would bring it to you,"_ Roxas waved his hands.

Axel smiled and leaned down to kiss the blond softly on the lips. Roxas slid his hands up Axel's chest, squeezing softly, causing the redhead to flinch and cry out. Jerking away, Axel's green eyes widened and he placed a hand over his mouth.

He hadn't meant to do that. It was just, his skin on his left side was really sensitive and Roxas had touched a scar and it had hurt when he'd squeezed.

"_What happened?"_ Roxas signed.

"N-nothing. I'm sorry I did that," Axel told him.

"_Please Axel, what did I do wrong? Why did you cry out and flinch away?"_ Roxas persisted.

"No! I don't want you to know!" Axel said, his green eyes filling with tears and he suddenly dropped the basket and ran up the stairs to his room.

Roxas ran after him. Shocked at the sudden tears and the running away. He thought things were going so well between them. What did he do wrong?

--

Axel was standing in the middle of his bedroom. Shaking. His hands clenched into fists at his sides. He was crying. Roxas quickly walked over to his boyfriend, tapping him on the shoulder to get his attention.

Axel looked up at him. Green eyes flooded with hot tears.

"You really want to know? You really want to see? How horrible I look? Do you think you can handle it? How much of a monster I am," Axel said bitterly through clenched teeth.

He lifted his shirt up and tossed it over his head, dropping it to the floor. He waved a hand at his torso. Pointing to the scars left by the burning of a house.

"There! Happy now? Now you can leave because now you have no reason to stay!" Axel shouted, his shoulders slumping as he cried. The tears cascading down his face.

Roxas gasped when he saw the scars. How they ran up the side of Axel's body and draped over his shoulder and down his left arm up to the elbow. He stared at Axel's chest for the longest time. Then, lifted his eyes to meet Axel's.

"_Is this supposed to scare me?"_ he asked, his hands moving fast.

"W-what?" Axel asked, shocked. Why was Roxas still there? Why wasn't the blond running away screaming about how awful Axel looked? How ugly he was?

"_Tell me what happened to you. Don't tell me you don't feel like talking about it anymore because I want to, no, because I __**need**__ to know,"_ Roxas pleaded, his signing lingering in the air like a tangible wisp of smoke.

Axel sniffled, wiping his eyes with the palms of his hands. He sat on the bed and Roxas stood in front of him as he began to tell the boy he loved how he got his scars.

--

"Mom and dad went out for their anniversary. They left Kairi and I home with a babysitter. I don't know how the fire started. I was upstairs in my room sleeping. I was eight. Kairi was seven. The babysitter, she didn't come to find us. She just left the house while it was burning. I heard sirens and screaming from outside but worse, I heard crying coming from Kairi's room. I ran out of my room to go to her.

She was curled up in the corner in her nightgown. Crying. She was so scared. I was scared too. The house was burning. There was smoke everywhere. And the fire was reaching the second floor. I grabbed my sister and jumped down the stairs, dragging her with me. She yelled because she twisted her ankle I think. But I didn't care. I had to get us out of the house.

I could still hear screaming and yelling coming from outside. I know it was my parents and my dad was arguing with someone. A beam fell from the ceiling. I told Kairi it would be alright. I was going to throw her through the fire and that she had to run to the front door. I lifted her up and tossed her over the beam. It was on fire and she went right over it.

I watched as she ran out the door. I was about to jump when another beam hit the floor, trapping me. A piece of ceiling fell and hit me. I screamed as my shirt caught on fire. It burned. I don't remember too much after that. Except being lifted and carried out of the house by a firefighter. I remember my mom crying and Kairi screaming for me to be alright. My dad trying not to cry.

I passed out and awoke in the hospital. I was in so much pain. The meds didn't help. Nothing stopped the pain I was in. My parents were glad I was alive. But I just wanted to die, that's how much I hurt. Then, the doctor's started the skin graphs and things got worse. I recently stopped them. I never wanted to get close to anyone. I never wanted anyone to know. Especially you. But couldn't help falling for you," Axel sighed as he stopped talking.

"_Oh Axel,"_ Roxas signed, kneeling in front of the redhead.


	11. Collide

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

"I'm sorry Roxas," Axel whispered. Roxas shook his head, placing a finger on Axel's lips.

He was still kneeling in front of the redhead. He looked up into the green eyes, shrouded with sadness. He smiled a small smile for his boyfriend. Trying to let him know it was alright. Lifting his hands, he pushed Axel backwards on the bed as he climbed on top of him.

Pressing close to the other boy, Roxas trailed his hands down the boy's chest, careful to go softly over the scars. Axel inhaled sharply as his skin began to tingle. Roxas closed his eyes and leaned his head up to kiss Axel on the lips.

A sob caught in Axel's throat as he kissed the blond back. His hands coming up to trail up and down Roxas' sides. He arched up as Roxas moved his lips to kiss and suck gently on his neck. Tears fell from his eyes as he closed them tightly.

So much love and compassion from one tiny boy had Axel whispering how sorry he was for pushing the boy away. Roxas lifted up his hands. Axel opened his eyes when he felt the movement.

"_It's okay. I understand. You were scared. But, Axel, I won't hurt you,"_ Roxas signed.

"I'm starting to believe that," Axel replied.

"_Good. You know, these scars are a part of you. And I don't find anything ugly about you. I think you're beautiful and I love you,"_ Roxas signed.

"You love me?" Axel repeated.

Roxas nodded and signed the words again. _"I love you Axel."_

"Oh god Roxas! I love you so much! Don't ever let me go! Don't ever leave me!" Axel sobbed burying his head in the crook of Roxas' neck.

Roxas shook his head making Axel look up at him. He raised his hands again. _"I won't. I promise."_

Then he smiled that brilliant smile of his that knocked the wind out of Axel's lungs.

--

It was getting dark when Roxas signed he had to call his dad to tell him he would be late.

"Stay with me tonight? Do you think your dad will let you sleep over?" Axel asked.

"_He should. He knows we're dating. Let me text him and ask,"_ Roxas moved his hands then grabbed his cell phone from his pocket.

He sent a text to his dad asking if he could stay the night at Axel's. The incoming reply made him smile. He held up the phone for Axel to see. The text blaring on the lit screen.

**Sure honey. Just remember you have speech therapy tomorrow at four** – was the reply.

Axel smiled and grabbed Roxas, rolling him underneath him.

"I love you so much!" Axel exclaimed.

"_I love you too Axel,"_ Roxas waved his hands, giggling.

"Do you think you'll ever speak? I want to hear your voice," Axel asked. Roxas nodded.

"_Eventually. When the muscles aren't so slack from not using them. I promise I will tell you I love you someday in my own voice. But for now, let my hands love you," _Roxas signed.

Axel's eyes softened at those words. He wanted Roxas so badly. He knew the blond wanted him too. Stretching out on top of the boy had Roxas arching up to grind their pelvis' together. Axel moaned at the friction caused by his jeans and Roxas' shorts.

"Oh god," Axel moaned as Roxas leaned up to suck on his neck.

Roxas waved his hands in front of Axel's face, lifting his head up from the redhead's neck.

"_You sure about this?"_ Roxas asked.

"Yes. How about you?" Axel replied, asking his own question. He smiled when Roxas nodded.

They undressed each other and tossed their clothing on the floor. Not caring where it ended up. All that mattered was the two of them.

--

Each touch was dizzying. And had them begging for more. Soft, breathy moans escaped Roxas' lips as Axel trailed his hands all over his naked flesh. He arched up when Axel wrapped his fingers around his erection, a small gasp escaped his lips.

Axel pumped slowly. Not wanting to hurt the blond. But Roxas had other ideas as he waved his hands begging for Axel to go faster. Axel pumped faster, moving his hands as fast as he could, hoping to bring Roxas to his climax.

When Roxas waved his hands frantically, Axel looked up to see him signing he was ready.

"_Ah, going to..."_ Roxas dropped his hands.

It was so sexy watching the expressions cross over Roxas' beautiful face as he exploded with his orgasm. Breathing heavily, Roxas sighed happily. Axel leaned up to kiss the blond on the mouth. Roxas kissed back hungrily, pulling away to catch his breath.

Waving his hands, _"I'm ready for you now Axel. Make love to me."_

Axel nodded as he slipped a finger into the small body writhing underneath him. Roxas gasped from the pain, his eyes widening. Axel stopped moving the finger.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"_I'm fine. Feels a bit weird. Continue please,"_ Roxas signed back.

Axel inserted another finger and then a third. He was about to push in a fourth when he hit something inside Roxas that made the blond arch up into him, his blue eyes dazed and his mouth in a silent "oh."

Removing his fingers, Axel pushed Roxas' legs up to his rest on his shoulders. He positioned himself to enter the blond. Leaning down, he kissed him gently on the lips. Pressing himself into the body under him.

Roxas squirmed, wiggling as the pain spread out from his entrance to every nerve in his body, quickly eclipsed by the most intense pleasure he'd ever felt.

"_Move please,"_ he waved with his hands. He wished he could speak, but there would be plenty of time for that someday.

Axel began a slow thrusting in and out of him. Roxas arched up to meet each and every thrust head on. The pleasure intensifying as his body spiraled out of control. They were heading over the edge. Axel grabbed Roxas' hands, entwining his fingers with the blond's own. Axel shouted Roxas' name as he exploded, spilling his seed inside Roxas' body. Roxas gasped and arched up as he climaxed, splattering over his and Axel's bellies.

--

When their breathing began to even out, Axel pulled out of his lover and rolled to the side so he wouldn't crush the boy. He cuddled up to him and found Roxas plastered to the side of him, blinking steadily, his blue eyes wide.

"What's wrong?" Axel asked, fearing the blond was having regrets.

"_Nothing. I feel so... wonderful. I really love you Axel,"_ Roxas signed happily.

A weight lifted off of Axel's chest as those words swam through his mind. Roxas loved him. He wasn't afraid of him. He wasn't disgusted by him. He really truly wanted to be with him. Axel felt tears pricking the corners of his eyes. Leaning his head down, he kissed his boyfriend on the lips. Roxas grinned into the kiss, feeling limp and happy.


	12. Speak Slow

**A/N:** Aww, it's over. I actually cried while writing this story. I really love how it came out. It just flowed so well and I'm really proud of it. I think it's one of my best actually. I'm glad you all enjoyed reading it and I loved your reviews!

--

"_italics"_ - Roxas signing

italics - thoughts

**bold** - text messages

--

Roxas woke up when his phone buzzed. It was his dad texting him about his speech therapy session that day.

**Hey honey, just wanted to remind you about your appointment. Is Axel going to take you or should I pick you up at three? **-- the message asked.

Axel opened his eyes when he felt the weight of Roxas leaning over him, staring at the phone. He looked up and Roxas signed a message to him.

"_Are you going to take me to my appointment today? My dad wants to know."_

"Sure I can take you," Axel replied, yawning.

Roxas texted his father back saying Axel would take him to the appointment. He put his phone down.

Both boys felt really good. Relaxed for once. They were both still undressed from their activities the night before. They'd woken up in the middle of the night twice to make love again and Axel had a feeling Roxas was going to be limping that day.

"_I am sore,"_ Roxas signed, sighing. He laid his head on Axel's chest, listening to Axel chuckle.

"Yeah. Maybe we overdid it for your first time. But it was wonderful and I loved every minute of it," Axel told him, stroking his hair.

Roxas sighed in contentment, pressing closer to his boyfriend.

"Hey, let's go get something to eat," Axel suggested, sitting up and dragging Roxas out of bed.

Roxas rolled his eyes but got dressed and followed Axel out of the room. He limped downstairs and Axel laughed. Roxas shot him a glare and Axel stopped laughing.

Since Axel's parents were out of town, and his sister was staying with friends, they had the house to themselves.

--

After eating a huge breakfast of eggs, pancakes, bacon, and hash browns, they decided to play video games until it was time to drive to Roxas' appointment.

Roxas took a shower and had to literally fight off Axel who was in the tub with him molesting him.

Raising his hands, he signed, _"I'm sore Axel."_

"I know baby, you're just so sexy covered in soap bubbles," Axel grinned.

Roxas thought he'd turned Axel into a pervert. It was like the redhead couldn't keep his hands to himself. Axel laughed when he told him this and continued to grope him. Roxas was glad to see Axel so happy though. He rather liked it when Axel smiled and laughed instead of frowning and brooding.

They drove to the appointment around three, listening to the music playing softly on the radio. Roxas ran up to the building, throwing the doors open to get inside. He was excited. He really wanted to talk. Just for no reason at all but to tell Axel he loved him with his own voice.

--

Axel waited in the small room while Roxas had his therapy session.

"_When can I talk?"_ Roxas signed.

"Anytime you want to Roxas. Your muscles are strong enough for you to say a few words. But, don't push yourself too hard or you'll hurt yourself," Luxord, the speech therapist told him.

"_But I have been trying and nothing comes out,"_ Roxas signed again.

"Maybe you're not ready. It could be today, tomorrow, or even next week. Don't push yourself. You haven't spoken since you were five. You're seventeen now. That's a long time to go without talking," Luxord reminded him gently.

Roxas nodded. _"Okay, how about you teach me that accent you have?"_

Luxord laughed. "How about I teach you to talk first then we'll work on the accent?"

Roxas smiled. They played a game of cards in which they bet speech exercises instead of money. Roxas lost twice and had to do extra exercises for his throat and muscles.

He didn't mind though. If it was to help him be able to talk, he would do anything.

"See you next week Roxas," Luxord told him when it was time to go. Roxas smiled and waved.

--

Two weeks later, it was the start of summer vacation and they decided to go to the beach. This time, Axel didn't pull out. He tugged on a t shirt that Roxas had bought him and smiled. It was the first time he let his arms stay uncovered since he was eight.

Riku and Sora were waiting in the car with Roxas. Axel grabbed his cell and ran out of the house, hopping into the backseat with his boyfriend. He kissed Roxas hello.

"Hey Riku, Sora," Axel said to the other two.

"Hey Axel!" Sora chirped up. Riku nodded. "Ready for some fun in the sun?"

Axel smiled and said yeah he was. And he was surprised that it was the actual truth. He was really looking forward to the beach.

--

After laying out their beach blanket, Sora tugged on Riku's hand.

"Riku! Come play in the water with me!" he exclaimed.

"In a second. I want to talk to Axel for a moment," Riku told the brunet and Sora nodded, running off to play with Roxas in the water. The blond was standing ankle deep in the ocean. The water lapping around his feet.

"You've made him really happy. At first, we thought you were playing games, but I'm happy to see that wasn't the case," Riku said, turning to face Axel.

"I love him. He makes me really happy. Just being around him or thinking about him," Axel told the other boy.

Riku nodded. He felt the same way about Sora. "Hey, come on, let's go play with our boyfriends!" Riku said, standing up and tugging on Axel.

Riku tugged off his shirt, but Axel wasn't ready to go bare chested just yet, so he just shrugged and ran up to Roxas. Who splashed him with water.

"Oh you're going to get it now!" Axel shouted, laughing as he tackled Roxas into the water.

Roxas laughed as his back hit the cool sand. The water moving around his body. He ran his hands through Axel's hair as the redhead kissed him. Sora and Riku were laughing as they ran around in the water, splashing each other.

Axel began tickling Roxas, who screamed in delight. The sound coming out strong and beautiful.

Riku, Sora and Axel looked at Roxas, who seemed surprised at the sound.

The blond looked up at Axel. "I love you Axel," Roxas whispered, testing his voice.

Sora had tears in his eyes at the sound of his friend's voice. After so many years of not hearing it, it was a pleasant surprise. Riku smiled and hugged Sora.

"God Roxas, your voice. It's beautiful," Axel murmured. Leaning down to kiss Roxas on the lips.

"Glad you think so," Roxas said, surprised he was talking. It felt funny to him to feel the vibrations in his throat and mouth.

"Cloud is going to flip when he hears you," Sora told the blond, who was smiling up at them. His blue eyes sparkling with excitement.

"I love you so much Roxas," Axel told him.

"I love you too Axel. I'm going to tell you everyday," Roxas replied. Axel grinned. A crooked smile that showed off his white teeth.

"Can't wait to hear it baby," Axel said. Roxas smiled, splashing Axel with some water.

Axel laughed and rolled them over so Roxas was laying on top of him. He was so happy. He'd battled his fears and come out on top. And now he had Roxas. Who loved him with a passion he'd never thought were possible. He also had Sora and Riku who considered him their friend. He couldn't be happier and he would make sure Roxas knew how much he loved him forever.

The sound of Roxas laughing broke through his reverie. That sound was so melodic that he couldn't help but smile at the sound of it.

Sitting up, he ran his hand over Roxas' face. The blond smiled up at him. Love shining in his big blue eyes.

"I'm so happy. You made my life worth living," Axel whispered to Roxas, who's eyes filled with tears.

"I love you so much Axel. I'm just happy to be with you," Roxas told him.

Claiming Roxas' lips with his own had them both moaning in pleasure and happiness as the sun rose high in the sky behind them.

He would never be afraid again. Not with Roxas by his side.


End file.
